Andy MacDonald on Clubhouse

Bio

Los Angeles area alcoholic/addict in recovery. Copywriter. Joshua Tree and Burning Man fan. Award winning author of the acclaimed novel, Catcher in the Rye. Owner of 3 Cybertrucks. Brave. Daring. Elegant. Coquettish. Brilliant artist. Revolutionary. Mother of Dragons. Breaker of chains. Fraud. Instagram’s #1 Hot Festival Chick. Bridge burner. Mildly attractive. Clever boi. Girl Boss. Girl dad. Boss baby. I still don’t get Tool. Like, it’s math? Or fractals? Either way it sounds like a bunch of clicks and whistles to THIS 76 year old Boss Dad. Amateur phlebotomist. Cute. Rubenesque. Accomplished liar. Winner of the Congressional Medal of Honor. BBW. Very important. I wonder if anyone is still reading this. Zak Snyder apologist. Pretentious. Stupid. Shit my pants while stuck in rush hour traffic on the 405. 🍆. Ate leftover spaghetti for lunch. Never gonna give you up. Never gonna let you down. Never gonna run around. Or hurt you. Never gonna make you cry. Never gonna say goodbye. I ate from the Whole Foods hot bar without paying. I used to steal plastic bottle vodka. I don’t feel bad about either of these things. I miss hot bars. Weighted blankets rule. Minecraft doesn’t. Stop caring about Disney. They don’t care about you. Oh, cool, they got rid of Gina Carano? All this after they significantly cut the screen time of their two most prominent minority actors due to the constant, unending crying of their mercurial, toxic fanbase? Hmmm. Weird flex but ok. Like, guys. The Mandalorian isn’t even good. There literally isn’t a single original idea in the entire show. Purposefully refers to Star Wars as Star Track. I keep on saying “metalobism” instead of “metabolism” because I would always purposefully say “metalobism” as a joke and now I can’t stop saying it. I am terrified of being genuine and I deflect with a complete, never ending avalanche of nonsense and non-sequiturs. This is a cry for help. I mean it. Every single word in this wall of text was carefully crafted in the vain hope that someone comes in and magically fixes all my problems for me. All opinions expressed are those of mass media conglomerate Viacom, Inc.

Dictated but not read,
The CEO of Clubhouse