Manju Harikrishnan on Clubhouse

Bio

അധ്യാപിക. അല്പം പാട്ടിനോടും കവിതയോടും നാടകത്തോടും. പിന്നെ പ്രകൃതിയോടും ഇഷ്ടം..

Recently, i heard someone I know, commenting "you have a daughter, you will probably only be relieved of your stress once you get her married". And that comment got me thinking. My daughter has never been a cause of my stress. Really. I dont think any parents should be stressed because they have a daughter. Not in this age and time. As a woman who raised one for the past 23 years and have been teaching hundreds of girls every year for the past 23 years, i can say, they are more than capable of taking care of themselves more than anyone else ever can. Being a mother to one and a teacher to many, the only thing I have ever focused on is to make her capable of being self dependent. She should never be in a position where she would have to choose between honor and self respect. She should not have to be forced to eat whatever is left on the table. To pick up religiously after someone. She should not come back home to take a shower and discover the toilet unflushed and have to clean up someone else's shit. She should not have to spend her life adjusting with the inner knowledge that she is not the only women in someone's life. She should have enough resources and a positive environment around her not to have a break down if she ever had to raise her kids by herself. She should not be the second or even the third priority to someone. She should not come home to someone who'd rather spend his whole time talking to a phone. She should not give the lock and key to her happiness to someone who is not worth it. Her children (if at all she has any) should not endure the generational trauma that we failed to fix. She should not have to cry herself to sleep everyday. My aim has always been to raise her well enough for her to not deal with anyone's shit. And to raise my son not to leave shit behind for someone to clean up. Quite literally. I want to be able to teach my students the same thing. Once you are sure your children are in a place where they know how they want to be treated and how they should treat someone. From that point on, you are as stress free as possible. In that regard, fortunately enough both my children keep me stress free.